Dear Abby Jr.

Many people know that the original Dear Abby and Ann Landers were sisters. But how many people know that both of their daughters also got in on the advice racket?

Unfortunately, one of them (Ann Landers' daughter) is much, much better at giving advice than the other, Dear Abby's daughter, who got to crib her Mom's name and newspaper column (and all the syndication money that goes with it!) Ann Landers Jr. respected her mother's wishes and let the name and the column retire when she did. If only Dear Abby Jr, had done the same.

Since the change in advisors happened a few years ago, I've been consistently dismayed by Dear Abby Jr's advice. But now that I have this blog, I have somewhere to complain about it. This is from yesterday's column....

A 14 year old San Francisco girl wrote in to ask what to do when she overhears adults make disparaging remarks about teenagers in general. Abby Jr. starts off with a nice quote from Socrates illustrating that this "problem", I prefer adult hypocrisy, has been going on for thousands of years and even Socrates wasn't immune. Now if she'd ended it there, all would have been okay.

But I guess she had column inches to fill and didn't want to answer another person's question. So she ended her response with this shitty piece of advice...

Any intelligent person knows that the vast majority of teens today are honest, hardworking, law-abiding and upstanding. Therefore, if you are being followed around by store owners, and bus passengers grab their belongings and scoot away when they see you, it's time to take a critical look at how you present yourself. Is there something about your appearance that could be considered weird or threatening? If the answer is "maybe," then it's time for a makeover.

Fuck YOU Abby Jr.! First of all, you must know that most people aren't that intelligent. And even if they accept that the teens they know are honest, hardworking, yadda, yadda, it doesn't mean squat when they're dealing with teens they don't know.

I'm mean such phenomena isn't limited to young people. Racists may not hate the people of color who clean their homes. And there are tons of anti-immigrant bigots (like, you, Rep. Tom Tancredo) who don't mind undocumented immigrants working on their home construction and landscaping. But it doesn't stop them from being complete, unmitigated assholes, to the ones they don't have a personal relationship with.

But the bottom line here is, why should this teen change her behavior or how she presents herself? She isn't the one with the problem. Neither her age, nor her appearance, matter as much as her behavior in public does. She's not going for a job interview. She's using public spaces, like buses and stores. Abby Jr. dropped the ball completely, not surprisingly, blaming the victim for the ignorant behavior of the masses of adults this girl is forced to interact with on a daily basis. For the good of the advice seeking population in the world, this Dear Abby should join her mother and retire ASAP, turning the column over to someone who actually gives good advice!

Although there is little this girl can do to stop the offenders, as Abby Jr. correctly notes, there is something adults can do! Speak up, whenever you see other adults wrongfully discriminating against kids in public. The offender will take it to heart far easier, if the criticism comes from a peer, than from another youth. And kids can resolve not to grow up to become the sort of hypocritical adults who say such stupid things.

Because as the Socrates quote points out, these issues have been with us for millennia. Kids today aren't any different than the teenage kids of ancient Greeks. Except they dress differently and listen to better music!